Sunday, April 7, 2013

Who Is God?

Many people over many generations have contemplated, meditated, debated and researched who God is or even what He might be. Some have questioned his even existence, whereas others, like myself, have mostly questioned what he might actually be like. Is He a good guy or a bad guy? Does He love me or is He repulsed?

I was first introduced to God as a little girl going to Sunday school. This God was big, powerful and somewhat scary. It appeared to me via the Old Testament of the Bible that God had quite a temper and did not tolerate disobedience without revenge and retribution! I noted that He seemed to choose His favorites for extra special blessings and tolerated (if not condoned) slavery. He inflicted plagues, asked people to do the unthinkable, required lots and lots of ritualistic sacrifice and demanded strict obedience... or else! Risking rejection or placing yourself outside the realm of favor He was not just a God to be revered but a God to be feared!

And then there was God's very much approachable son Jesus! Now this was a part of God I could relate to and dare to approach for spiritual support and guidance. His Biblical description seemed so different to me than that of His Father. He loved and accepted everybody no matter what! He also told some really good stories and performed miracles without effort. He was a part of the Divine I wanted to be close to! Jesus had my back!

Where God seemed judgmental & condemning... Jesus seemed totally accepting and forgiving! If He reprimanded anyone it seemed to be because He knew we could do better... be better. He knew we would be so more satisfied with Him than without Him!

Ahhh... the perspective of youth! How much was the Grace of Jesus Christ was needed and longed for! A simple Savior with a simple plan of salvation. The Faith of a child was all that it would take to insure you were in His loving grasp forever! It was a sweet moment to have been in... alas, it didn't last beyond my younger years.

Unfortunately, my Faith became much more complicated as I developed into a teen. Life seemed to become more difficult... I began to look for spiritual answers to these new problems. I was "educated" by the church on "the rules" of the game. The Apostle Paul's letters had me especially stressed out! Wearing a mini skirt might cause someone else to sin, so that was out! "Secular" music was filled with error and temptation! So, that was a no-no as well! Legalism replaced love and my Spiritual anxiety soured. Would I, could I ever get it right?! What was the "it" anyway? Christianity became more and more confusing! I began to lose faith that I could ever feel like I was one of His children... I wasn't sure I could trust Him to lead my life. If I didn't comply perfectly would I still be "in" or was I one sin away from condemnation?

I began to question... why would a loving God put the tree of knowledge in the garden of Eden anyway? Knowing we would eventually succumb to the irresistible temptation to create just like God did... knowing we would chose to be separated from Him and try this thing called life on our own without God. Our Creator no longer super close, the great deceiver (aka Satan) was able and free to have his way with us... torturing us, lying to us, and causing us perpetual pain in hopes we would be so distracted we would forget how we got into this predicament in the first place! Well... (sigh) it looks like it worked.

Who is this God I yearn for? Who is this Jesus that came to save me from myself? Now separate from God I yearned to meet Him again... to walk with Him and talk with Him like Eve did before that blasted apple was in the picture! I wanted to know so many things! What was God thinking?What's He like? What's He all about? Did the Bible get "it" right? Is that all... or is there more to Him than that? The more I tried learn & look for the answers the more complicated it became!

Who is this mysterious invisible God that sent His son so that we may know Him? And there it was. There laid the answer. Jesus is the answer to who God really is... Loving, Forgiving, Full of Grace & Acceptance. He was sent to us in Human form so we could know Him. And He is forever calling us to Him through the power of the Holy Spirit... Jesus' parting gift to us from above! His Voice answering in our darkest moments... with Love.

One thing seems to resonate with my soul and seems very clear. We may be vessels through which His love can reach others, however God is the Source of "it" all. Like an eternal well, always flowing... His love is abundant and never ending. To learn to love is to learn about God. To know love is to know God. It's simplicity returns me back to the simple faith of a child... the desire for unconditional love that calls us Home to Him. Simply, God is that Love.

❤ God is Love is God.


6 comments:

  1. you are like me. I have a zillion questions about why God allows what.

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    1. I do too! I sometimes wonder if I'll ever know... But I can't help but hope it will all make sense one day! :) Thanks for commenting!

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  2. I can totally relate in a lot of ways! Thank you for posting this. I know I'm not alone :)

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  3. I am glad you were able to escape fundamentalism and not lose Jesus in the process. You are right: "Jesus is the answer to who God really is... Loving, Forgiving, Full of Grace & Acceptance."

    It seems that you are discovering Jesus without baggage.

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